The Official Countdown

So now that we're firmly in August, the scary day-by-day countdown has begun.

My office-mate, Ashley, who has been campaigning since finding out that I'm pregnant that She-Blob be born on her birthday (a highly successful endeavor, by the way, as my C-Section date is set for that very day) has "kindly" placed post-its bearing the number of days left between our desks, and has conscientiously been updating the count daily.

Should I have somehow missed the day-glo yellow piece of paper with a large number and arrows pointing to both my and Ashley's desks, I have all of you office friends to point it out to me. If I am away from work, and unable to see "The Post-It," I can fall back on you waitresses, store clerks, and random strangers to ask me my due date and, with that slightly-concerned look on your faces (as if you think I might randomly pop now just because we talk about it) say "Ohhh, that's soooonnn...." And of course I have you, my parents and in-laws reminding me of how exciting the upcoming (so soooonnnnn!!!!) day is...

And to all of you I say: STOP!

In the past 8+ months, I've expended a great deal of energy ignoring calendars, avoiding post-its, and concentrating on short-term house-related projects. I have ignored my stomach, which is rapidly expanding to gargantuan proportions. I have stockpiled all baby-related items behind closed doors where I do not need to confront them. I have squarely pretended that "What To Expect When You're Expecting" is not sitting on my book-shelf. In short, I am keeping my head as deeply buried in the sand for as long as humanly possible.

I know that at the end of the day, the end result is unavoidable. Which has made my denial all the stronger - I mean, if it's coming anyway, not thinking about it is just as effective as thinking about it. So in the meantime, while I wander about Ikea and Target, pretending that I'm buying changing pads (what the hell IS a changing pad?!) for someone else, let me have it. It'll all be over soon enough. In 22 days, to be precise. Unless of course, I randomly pop sooner. Just because we're talking about it.

Image by browneyedgirlie1997